One, Two...Skip a Month - I want to be a tree?

November was eaten by worry and stress.  I'm not sure that I did much note worthy mothering a part from the big stuff like feeding, cleaning, clothing and hugging.

In the garden we started a strawberry patch as well as an asparagus bed.  Will has informed me that I'm not allowed to bring home anything else that will require his involvement in the garden.  Seems fair.  He's been very lenient with me and the garden as my place of refuge and soul care.  I'm content with where things are at and will continue to do my best to maintain it and keep things growing out there that will end up on our dinner plates.

We visited a new church on a Sunday where our own took the week off for a Thanksgiving Potluck.  To my core, I enjoyed the service.  I started crying during the second set, the first song was How Great Thou Art, because it was the first time I had connected to God through worship since our loss.  I thought about how those I love who are now in heaven are singing these kinds of songs in worship and enveloped by his presence continually.  I kept crying throughout the set and even after church was over.  People walked past us, leaving the meeting space, and I was still quietly sobbing.  When we went to fetch our kids, the workers were walking them out to us because it had been so long. Oops.

The teaching that morning covered Psalm 95 as part of their "Look Up" series in going through the Psalms:

The following week, Will was out of town so I went back to the church we had visited.  The main pastor offered a summary of the series "Looking up" and I felt lost and disappointed.  He kept saying things that I wished he'd explain further but in a summary teaching it was appropriate to just reference a previous sermon.  So, I decided to go back and listen to the series online starting at the beginning, his talk on the first Psalm.

Psalm 1:  Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers.  But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night.  He is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither.  Whatever he does prospers.  Not so the wicked!  They are like chaff that the wind blows away.  Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgement, nor sinners in the assembly of the righteous.  For the Lord watches over the way of the righteous, but the way of the wicked will perish.

We're told what not to do.
We're told what to do.
We're told that we'll be like a tree planted by a stream, healthy and bearing fruit without withered leaves.
We'll be a "Psalm 1 Tree"

This phrase, Psalm 1 Tree, is one that fit the need I've had to describe my desire to grow in godliness.  "Woman of God" didn't quite describe it, too cliche.  A Psalm 1 Tree has deep roots.  It won't be easily toppled over by the strong winds of life that will ultimately come and ruffle it's branches.  To me a Psalm 1 Tree is a solid tree, like a live oak.  Slow growing but long lasting, stable and unbending.  It provides shade for the saplings growing nearby (my children) and an example to follow with arms outstretched upward in worship at all times.

5+2+2=9

We celebrated all the kids' birthdays today with a small group of family and good home cooking!  I made beef stew seasoned with thyme from the garden, served over mashed potatoes with rosemary from the garden.  We had green beans (from the store) and broccoli greens from the garden.

I made the little shirts they're wearing and may make it a tradition for as long as they are willing to wear a shirt with their new age.  It's a pretty exciting thing, so I'm hoping to get a few years out of it.  I didn't buy anything special, it's all re-claimed.  I printed out the numbers to use as a pattern and then cut up old t-shirts in two colors, one slightly larger than the other.  Then, I pinned it to the shirt and did my best to neatly sew around the number.  I also made the tutu Eden is wearing, not visible in this picture.

After the party, Adriaan and friends along with their dads went on a camping trip.  They had a wonderful time!

Back in October, on the actual day of the twins' b-days we went to Mueller lake park as a family to celebrate.  We played, ate a picnic and Adriaan who had just learned to ride his bike sans training wheels had space to bike around.  The twins and I followed, trying to keep up but getting distracted by ducks, geese and other kids doing fun things.

Why even bother...

I cleaned the tubs, as well as the rest of the house in preparation for family coming into town for the big birthday party.  But, then the kids took a bath and I wonder why I even bother...

Dino-tails

I took time off in October to rest and mourn but couldn't sit still, so I decided to make dino-tails for the kids to wear trick or treating.  They were a hit with a few people and I ended up selling over a dozen more and I was happy for the project to keep me busy.

Trick or Treating

Happy Halloween

Weekly Planning Meeting

Sometime in the last year or so Will and I started having a weekly planning session on Sunday evenings.  We go day by day and discuss the regular things that happen as well as any other special things planned.  These meetings have been so helpful and alleviate stress caused by frantic realizations that we're double-booked.  It's also necessary now that there are five people and generally, four different schedules to accommodate.

About a year ago, we added a new component to our weekly planning.  We have assigned a cleaning chore to each day of the week.  For example, on Mondays the bathrooms are cleaned and on Wednesdays I don't clean anything because that's grocery day and that's enough for one day.

We've started something new this week, thanks to another suggestion from Ellen and her time with another mom who has several kids and stays organized.  She and her husband also have a weekly planning time but during that time they discuss what particular thing they'll focus on with each child...and possibly themselves.  So, this week the "thing" we're working on is making sure that the kitchen is clean before bed.

Hmm.  Will went to bed an hour ago and I'm about to fall in bed myself.  And, well...the kitchen isn't clean.
How about we start tomorrow.

-----

Will had to leave soon after dinner on Tuesday and I was really quite exhausted but with Adriaan's help we managed to get the kitchen looking acceptable.

Last night, I cleaned up while we were waiting for Will to put the finishing touches on dinner.  We ate later than usual because Michele joined us after taking Ado to soccer practice.  The twins were already in bed asleep and dinner was peaceful, so nice.  There wasn't much to do after dinner but rinse plates, put them in the dishwasher and start it up.  There really is a secret here...to clean as you cook.  Or, to have dinner ready and waiting while you clean up and then serve the food.  We lack the self discipline and motivation to clean a messy kitchen after our bellies are full and happy.  I would be more motivated to clean if I knew that as soon as it was done, I could eat!

Uh, today is Friday and I think we've done a pretty good job this week.  It seems like one of us has to be in charge of getting the kids ready for bed and the other can clean the kitchen.  The days of team work (as in doing things together) seem to be on hold.  I'm much faster at kitchen cleaning so it tends to be me in the the kitchen and Will with the kids.

10.24.11 -- I did well this week at...

Monday:  This morning was Mom's Club at Redeemer Prez.  We discussed Dobson's book "Bringing Up Girls."  The children got to play with friends.
Adriaan came with me to Hobby Lobby to purchase fabric and supplies to fill an order for Dino-Tails!  I'm so looking forward to this little job I have for the next few weeks.  Perhaps another batch of orders will come in and keep me busy until Christmas.  We've been discussing home school expenses and could use a source of income to cover the curriculum fees.


Tuesday:  The twins had their 2 year well check!  Eden is 20th in weight, 25th in height.  Sebastian is 50th in height and 75th in weight.  He jumped from the 50th to 75th in weight which caused concern for the doctor.  Seb also has a large belly that gets hard from time to time and he has a smaller appetite than Eden.  So, we had to go for an ultrasound just to make sure all was well.
After the ultrasound Seb and I had our first Sebbie-Mama date at starbucks.  He drank milk and ate graham crackers and I had a chai tea latte.  We had a nice time together, just the two of us.  He was absorbed in his excitement over cars, trucks, buses and planes all visible from our outside table near an intersection.  We didn't have much of a conversation.  He was mostly yelling, "hi bus!" and "bye bye bus!"  The same comments were made loudly toward cars, trucks and planes.
We went out to eat to celebrate selling the Explorer.

Wednesday:  My desire was to combine something I needed to do, grocery shopping, with something that would be fun for the twins, playing at a park.  So, we went to central market.  After buying our groceries we spent 30ish minutes on the play ground.  I talked with another mom who I've seen at different story times and we realized that she lives on our block and has a little girl Adriaan's age.  In fact, her daughter, Nora, goes to school with Jette (our over the fence neighbor).  Nora also has a little brother who is 19 months old.
I'm thrilled to find another family in the hood with kids the same ages as ours!
I got to spend a good bit of time in the garden and the twins helped.  We were spreading the composted horse manure around the newly dug beds to prepare for sheet mulching.  I used a large shovel and wheel barrow but even with their tiny shovel and easter egg they were able to move a bit of compost here and there!

Thursday:  Rough day on the trying to be a good mom front.  The babies spent a good amount of time in the toy room.  Another wave of grief hit me and I didn't want to be anyone's mama.  At the end of the day, everyone was alive, had been fed and were kept clean.

Friday:  So, to attempt to make up for a dismal failure yesterday I got out of the house with the babies.  After breakfast, I started dinner in the crock pot and we got out of the house.  We went to the arboretum to play on the cows and then met friends at the North Village story time.  It was our first time at that story time and probably my favorite.  The librarian does a great job, it's energetic and not too crowded.

Native Wild Flower Meadow

I attended a free class at the Natural Gardener this past weekend and learned a good bit about how to create a wild flower meadow.  We don't have gobs of open land needing to be cultivated, but a small space in the back yard bursting with color each Spring would be glorious!  In my day dreams, we have an amazing bluebonnet patch and can take pictures of our kids in our own yard instead of finding some safe place near a highway.  It really is an odd tradition to photograph our children in weeds, but bluebonnets are incredible!